You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
He shit in the fireplace
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
