I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
