he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
