You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize