The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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