The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
