and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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