I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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