Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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