if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
