Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Screwed.edu
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
