First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
