Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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