I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
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