i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
