Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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