very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize