Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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