Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize