He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
