how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize