Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
