It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
