Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
