So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize