But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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