Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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