wat bout pragnant strippers??
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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