I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
