Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
