Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
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