I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Randomize
