I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
