is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
