The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
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