big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Randomize
