He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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