HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
birth control should be required to get into college
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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