What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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