Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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