i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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