i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
