oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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