Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize
