I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
