There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Randomize
