gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
