Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize
