i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
