The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
