Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
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